Demonic Tutor

Magic: the Gathering in the UK

So part of the fun of formats is working out what is good and going through that learning curve.  Once you know everything it's less interesting.

One really good way to have things be unknown is to have new cards.  But that means someone has to invent them, or a new set has to be released.

Unless ... you play Chaos Badger!

I wrote a program that generates random cards by semi-intelligently "colliding" two existing cards.

Examples:

Raging Choker
1R
Creature Artifact - Cat
Haste

At the beginning of your end step, target opponent gains control of Raging Choker and puts a charge counter on it.
At the beginning of your upkeep, Raging Choker deals damage to you equal to the number of charge counters on it.
{3}: Put a charge counter on Raging Choker or remove one from it.
2/2

Darksteel Cohort
4G
Artifact Creature - Golem Treefolk Warrior
Flash
Vigilance
Darksteel Cohort is indestructible.

Darksteel Cohort gets +1/+1 as long as you control another green creature.
3/4

Linessa, Badger
2UG
Legendary Creature - Human Wizard Badger
{X}{U}{U}, {T}: Return target creature with converted mana cost X to its owner's hand.
Grandeur — Discard another card named Linessa, Badger: Target player returns a creature he or she controls to its owner's hand, then repeats this process for an artifact, an enchantment, and a land.

Whenever Linessa, Badger blocks, it gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
3/2

Living Mimic
3BU
Instant

As an additional cost to cast Living Mimic, sacrifice a creature.

Each player exiles all creature cards from his or her graveyard, then sacrifices all creatures he or she controls, then puts all cards he or she exiled this way onto the battlefield.

Search your library for a card with the same name as target nontoken creature and put that card onto the battlefield. Then shuffle your library.

War Wurm
5RGW
Enchantment Creature - Wurm
{X}{R}: This turn, creatures can't block unless their controller pays {X} for each blocking creature he or she controls.

Whenever War Wurm attacks, destroy all other creatures.
7/7

Toxic Gardener
4BR
Creature - Zombie Goblin
Infect
{B}: Regenerate Toxic Gardener.

When Toxic Gardener dies, destroy target land.
4/1

Darigaaz's Slime
3G
Artifact Creature - Golem Ooze
{1}, Sacrifice Darigaaz's Slime: Add {B}{R}{G} to your mana pool.

Flash
Devour 1 (As this enters the battlefield, you may sacrifice any number of creatures. This creature enters the battlefield with that many +1/+1 counters on it.)
3/2

Awesome!

Chaos Badger cube coming soon ...

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Sooo, I refined the program a little to deal with types better in preparation for randoming up some cards and automatically generating proxies.  And while I was in there I added a cheeky "mash up more than two cards switch".  Beyond two it definitely gets really silly, though:

Bloodlord Fuel Goo 2BUR
Creature — Vampire Ooze Warrior
Counter target spell, then proliferate. (You choose any number of permanents and/or players with counters on them, then give each another counter of a kind already there.)
Bloodthirst 3 (If an opponent was dealt damage this turn, this creature enters the battlefield with three +1/+1 counters on it.)
Flying
Whenever you cast a Vampire creature spell, it gains bloodthirst 3.
Bloodlord Fuel Goo enters the battlefield with three +1/+1 counters on it.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may flip a coin. If you win the flip, put a +1/+1 counter on Bloodlord Fuel Goo. If you lose the flip, remove a +1/+1 counter from Bloodlord Fuel Goo.
Flash
3/0

Living Karador, Bell 5BGWG
Legendary Sorcery Creature — Centaur Human Spirit Monk
Suspend 3—{2}{B}{B} (Rather than cast this card from your hand, pay {2}{B}{B} and exile it with three time counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a time counter. When the last is removed, cast it without paying its mana cost.)
Each player exiles all creature cards from his or her graveyard, then sacrifices all creatures he or she controls, then puts all cards he or she exiled this way onto the battlefield.
Living Karador, Bell costs {1} less to cast for each creature card in your graveyard.
During each of your turns, you may cast one creature card from your graveyard.
3/3

Surging Panic Flowstone Jace, Numbers RRUG
Artifact Planeswalker Creature — Human Jace Spellshaper
Ripple 4 (When you cast this spell, you may reveal the top four cards of your library. You may cast any revealed cards with the same name as this spell without paying their mana costs. Put the rest on the bottom of your library.)
Surging Panic Flowstone Jace, Numbers deals 2 damage to target creature or player.
+1: Draw a card. Target player puts the top card of his or her library into his or her graveyard.
0: Target player puts the top ten cards of his or her library into his or her graveyard.
-7: Any number of target players each draw twenty cards.
Until end of turn, target creature gains trample and gets +X/+X, where X is the number of attacking creatures.
{T}, Sacrifice Surging Panic Flowstone Jace, Numbers: Target creature can't block this turn.
When Surging Panic Flowstone Jace, Numbers is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, you may pay {R}. If you do, draw a card.
{1}{R}, {T}, Discard a card: Target creature gets +1/-1 and gains haste until end of turn.
Flash

Starting Loyalty: 5
2/2

Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher RWBWWRWGUB
Artifact Enchantment Creature — Giant Hound Bird Angel Dwarf Human Minion Warrior Soldier Spirit Shaman Wizard Scout
Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher enters the battlefield tapped.<br />
Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher doesn't untap during your untap step.<br />
Whenever Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher is dealt damage, untap it.<br />
Discard a card: Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher gains first strike until end of turn.<br />
At the beginning of each player's upkeep, that player discards a card.<br />
Flash<br />
Affinity for artifacts (This spell costs {1} less to cast for each artifact you control.)<br />
{T}: Target creature gets +0/+1 until end of turn.<br />
Flying, protection from Dragons<br />
Cumulative upkeep {1}{W} (At the beginning of your upkeep, put an age counter on this permanent, then sacrifice it unless you pay its upkeep cost for each age counter on it.)<br />
Damage that would reduce your life total to less than 1 reduces it to 1 instead.<br />
When Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher enters the battlefield, if you control two or more Mountains, you may destroy target artifact.<br />
When Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher enters the battlefield, if you control two or more Plains, you may destroy target enchantment.<br />
When Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher dies, each player may search his or her library for up to two basic land cards and put them onto the battlefield. Then each player who searched his or her library this way shuffles it.<br />
{U}: Target creature becomes an artifact in addition to its other types until end of turn.<br />
{U}: Until end of turn, target artifact creature becomes blue and isn't an artifact.<br />
When Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher enters the battlefield, exile it unless you discard a creature card.<br />
When Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher dies, exile Deep-Slumber Patrol Necrogen Scale Dragonstalker Sustaining Duergar Veteran Neurok Snatcher and return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield.<br />
7/2

Also I think this is my favorite card generated yet, but I don't think I can print it even in this format as it is beyond ridiculous:

Vivid Jitte
Legendary Artifact Land — Equipment
Vivid Jitte enters the battlefield tapped with two charge counters on it.
{T}: Add {G} to your mana pool.
{T}, Remove a charge counter from Vivid Jitte: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage, put two charge counters on Vivid Jitte.
Remove a charge counter from Vivid Jitte: Choose one — Equipped creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn; or target creature gets -1/-1 until end of turn; or you gain 2 life.
Equip {2}

Yup, a free Jitte that starts with two counters and taps for any color of mana.

Anyway, I will proxy up some of the two-card bad boys and probably bring them to the Saturday prerelease ...

Yes! that sounds way better than actually playing M13!

This makes me sad that I can't make the prerelease. Chaos Badger is clearly the format of the gods!

The prerelease card is:

Slayer Adept 2WU
Legendary Creature — Human Soldier Wizard
When Slayer Adept enters the battlefield, you may destroy target Vampire, Werewolf, or Zombie.
{2}{U}{U}, {T}: Counter target spell.
3/1

Actually, I think I might come back to London tomorrow daytime and could be around for some Friday Night Chaos Badger.

Anyone up for it?

No pre-release for me either :( 

That sounds great, I think Glenn and I will be around and hadn't made any firm plans. I'll see if he is interested in Chaos Badger'ing it up. We can do my place if people want, only problem is I have no printer.


Thomas David Baker said:

The prerelease card is:

Slayer Adept 2WU
Legendary Creature — Human Soldier Wizard
When Slayer Adept enters the battlefield, you may destroy target Vampire, Werewolf, or Zombie.
{2}{U}{U}, {T}: Counter target spell.
3/1

Actually, I think I might come back to London tomorrow daytime and could be around for some Friday Night Chaos Badger.

Anyone up for it?

Can't make Friday, but if it's available at the release (or just randomly next week) I'm so in!

Will the set support Vampire Ooze Warrior tribal?

Simon- I am all over this awesome format like a rash, chaos badger plus beer sounds like an awesome plan batman

Sorry dudes I am not going to make it back to London til 9-10 tonight.  I can put the 360 proxies I have generated up on the internet if that helps?

I have to leave in the afternoon but I will bring it to the pre-re for some post-pre-re #1 shenanigans.

I can print stuff off if you want, just direct me somewhere and I shall get that sorted

Thomas David Baker said:

Sorry dudes I am not going to make it back to London til 9-10 tonight.  I can put the 360 proxies I have generated up on the internet if that helps?

I have to leave in the afternoon but I will bring it to the pre-re for some post-pre-re #1 shenanigans.

Hey Glenn, that would be awesome if you are coming to the prerelease.  I put half of the random 360 I generated up here:

    http://bluebones.net/chaosbadger/

Let me know if you manage to print them and I'll print whatever else is needed when I get home tonight.

Thanks!

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